LeMoN iS dA iN dInG nOw

2008-05-26T15:38:00.002+08:00

Hey me at dazhi hse so u can guess hu am i right? we don have anything to update leh cause we no fren no new event. jobless somemore. even if gt job also never make new frens. so conclusion no frens. y? becoz of looks is it? but dazhi push my chair and insisted that it is not based on looks cause she is much better looking that some1. there must be some1 out there. i make new fren call darren. a nice name and better that daren that dazhi has meet in ntu. darren in mj is still the best. so don anyhow choose name. save the earth. stop global warming. yeah.

2006-12-09T18:08:00.000+08:00

( Click on the above to have a closer look)

Details next time...

2006-12-04T16:00:00.000+08:00

Hey! Big news big news!!! 2 pigs r being employed to work at expo- SITEX06. SAdly not based on looks but because of our size...Our supervisor secretly told us on the last day of work ...that they employed ppl based on whether they r big-sized enuff to carry the good ard...and if they can eat bitter (piao 1 yang2 guo4 hai3, wo3 chi1 de qi2 ku3)... Oh did i tell u sth... They have fabulous prizes install for us...Just spent $50 n u will get a chance to win the GRAND prize at the lucky draw...See below for the ULtiMAtE prize

yah! So in the end nobody went to buy any products...or maybe they did but nobody went to register for the luckydraw...See the the surrounding n u will discover that NODODY is Queueing... So basically we stood there for 4 days without any customers n we came to a conclusion based on our personal observations of all the guys at our booth:

8 out of 10 Guys go for looks and figures

Evidence: Nobody even bother to look at us even though there wasn't any customers....we tried to tok to them n they either ignore us or say U so big sized ...even bigger than me...go n shift the goods ard la...

Wat abt the other 2 guys...they aren't any better either...one goes for looks ONLY...the other even worse...Regardless of looks...whether they looked erm ok la or like aunty or even zombie he still say they very pretty like his ANGELS!!! cos they all got figures...Then for us...he kept insisting that we r DEvils...but hang ard us...hoping that his DARLING angels will come n save him....siao one la him...

ConCLUSION: ALL GUYS GO FOR OUTER BEAUTY ...WHETHER IT'S LOOKS OR FIGURES OR BOTH...and sadly enuff, we don't have both...so pathetic rite? Haiz... lives like tat...so boring so sad ...looking forward to our next job...hopefully it's a job freed of discrimination :)

2006-11-19T12:10:00.000+08:00

Hey as promised, we will tell u why we hate that guy so much. Erm but we don really hate him so much lah. Erm but we also don really like him. But sometimes, we think he is quite good also lah. But we must say why we hate him.

3 MoSt sickening, digusting reasons OUT of 2500000 Why we HATE him

1) Actually his hair is ok de, but don know why it becomes like that 1 day. Not because of the haze or the wind leh. He purposely make this hair on this special occasion. huh which day? that day he date me huh? erm got lah but we go out as a clique. but very exerating leh. bring him out very throw face leh. think alot of guys don dare to da1 shan4 us becoz of him. thought he is siao siao 1. Tat is the reason y we hate him. He make us lost a lot of opportunities.

2) After every exam, he came out with that sickening smiley face. Ya that photo shows that sickening smiley face. Then he keep saying the exam is very easy. He make us so demoralised. Think he is possessed or he keep little ghost. So selfish lor him, got such a good way to get good result also never share with the clique members, hey clique leh. So reasonable right? Imagine after every exam, he came and tell u how easy is the exam then teach u how to do. Ya that is the feeling.

3) His complexion is damn good! We r so jealous of his complexion. He secretly tell us his method. So i secretly write down here. Hope he don't mind. When u bath rite... Save on facial products... no point relying on those expensive and useless harmful skin care products lih "XK 2"...or "Bioabsence" Look at his complexion! From any angle under different lighting conditions, his skin glows n shines from within.... His secret recipe for his once useless skin : "When shampoo-ing, don't waste the foam...let it trickle down to your face n scrub real hard...i mean REAL HARD...yup tat's my formula"

Now everybody go wash your hair n face together...Let it be a habit n will look just as good as kel... KEL IS SO GOOD N DASHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Watmore....he even shared his 10 years of secret formula with us...hoping you will turn out just like him...For us, we dun heed his advice...we prefer to stay this way 4eva....haha

2006-11-18T02:34:00.001+08:00

OmG!!! We R in seriouS trouble!!! Help US...
The guy from the previous post is very angry with us for posting n colouring his foto...
N he's very scary n violent.... U noe wat? He tried to strangle us... But obviously he failed cos we can't be dead rite since we r still typing tis very entry... Plus our necks so thick ... cannot even strangle lor...So we would sincerely like to apologised to tis particular guy ...

"We R VERY SORRY! WOULD U PLS FORGIVE US? PLS CONTINUE TO BE FRENS WITH US PLS!!! IF U DUN, WE DUN HAVE OTHER GUY FRENS LE!!! HOW CAN U FORSAKE US"

To show how sincere n apologetic we r...we made sth specially for him...Hope he likes it n forgive us...This is our gift...to him n his gf-to-be (kel if u r reading this which we think u confirm will...pls dun kill us k...)

2006-11-18T02:02:00.000+08:00

Can U recognise him? i specially keep his eyes intact because he is the one who has the electrifying eyes and trust me, some of the gers have been electrocuted by his eyes and is under his curse now. Give u some hints. He has appear in our blog b4. Y do we colour his face? Some reasons but shall elaborate when i am free cause i am going to have my beauty sleep now. So for more information, STAY TUNED to our blog. btw if u have guess who he is, please don spread around.

2006-10-06T22:01:00.000+08:00

Today's entry will be a short one:) N we r finally updating... Here's our qn to u!

Well, can u guess who we R?

Come on la...Dun give me lame answers leh...Obviously the ans is not mp n kl la...Why on earth would we ask such a stupid question? We noe who we r ...So tell me who r we pretending to be? Very obvious liao rite? Ok here's another hint for those that r not as intellectual as us...so stupid lol
The hint very obvious le rite? Got it?

Ok ok stop praising us...stop saying we are two PRETTY good looking girls in mj uniform...it can be rather irritating sometimes when we kept hearing ppl repeatedly saying we PRETTY, CHIO, ADORABLE (the list goes on...) N of cos we noe we are ....But tat aside, presenting to U guys today... the legandary Chang-er n Jade rabbit...haha told ya it wasn't hard to guess...we look like wad...mp is obviously pretending to be the supposedly ravishing chang-er, u noe the girl that accidentally swallowed some pills n flew to the moon where she found her not-suppose-to-be ugly freaky looking rabbit (kl) as companion...

So did u guess correctly? If not tat's ok la...that shows u r normal...who in the rite mind will actually figure it out correctly??? So, not entirely ur fault cos relooking at the 2 pics...we got a major discovery...we look like 2 stupid guy doing some silly poses in front of an almost cracked camera lens...so dun despair k...dun jump down buildings if u cannot guess it k?

Haiz entry's getting long n boring so just end here lor...wait, i shall end a little later at there (u will noe where "there" is after u read thru tis whole rubbish)...OK so we just want to wish everybody a HAPPy MiD-auTuM FeatiVal...May all of u have a wonderful time with ur love ones ...Cos we are...haha ya rite.... ok "there" is coming out soon = ending soon .(there)

2006-09-21T15:27:00.000+08:00

Today is a normal day for everyboday...Mp's rolling on her bed...think it broke n she kena hit on the face...even uglier...haiz nvm la...she will look the same...For me leh? i'm rotting, decomposing...think i look slimmer now... can see all those hseflies oso...or is it i 4got to bath??? eeks! i stink... But today is definitely a happy n joyous occassion for JIE cum curd cum the prettiest and intelligent gurl in our clique...It's her mum's suffering day 18 yrs ago...but think her mum quite happy la....cos she turned out well...not like us... look at us...the only thing nice abt us is the ribbons...

Yst was the start a wonderful "surprise"... a "love triangle " play carefully planned by us.... Good for jie lor...got 2 guys giving her flowers....summore both look like 2 prince charming (without a horse but on bus 11) walking dashing down the long flight of stairs towards our darling precious princess-to-be...so romantic...it was reported that every1 heard some special music while both guys walked down... Think jie had a hard time choosing between both kevin or kelvin...even though both sounds and look ard the same ( hey i mean the name itself not the person), but obviously got difference...hmm... who should she choose...so kind hearted soul like us will offer our service...(not tat kind of service k? but the other kind)...

Here r the 2 candidates...both r single n available currently...note: currently only hor...they r up for grabs n selling like hotcakes...macdonald's de not the normal market selling type...ard $5.30 i think... calories ard 500? not very sure but not impt ....oh it comes with maple sauce...it's sweet like us noe! ok let's do some analyzing NOW...

Intro: kevin is the one on the left n obviously kelvin cannot be the one on the left rite? since kev is on the left so kel is on the right. So which one better? Kel first. Btw he's from our clique n oh his title is : da3 zha2 boy...meaning any lousy dirty jobs like mopping floor cleaning toilet n dating mp...he will do it all voluntarily noe... FOC summore... So basically based on all these he's a nice guy wad? summore sacrifice to date mp to cheer her up...tat's the ULTIMATE sacrifice he had done for our clique n for the sake of the society....so with him as yr bf actually ok wat...but must have balance view...why is he not good? An interview with his one-day-gf, mp revealed that he very the color...as in se4... really no taste lor anybody he oso can lay his hands on....first mp...then i oso "sway sway" kena drag into the picture.... See for urself

Look at where his hands are!!!

So jie ah? Do u think u live with tis guy 4eva? N eva n eva n live happily ever after cos the fairytale stories me n mp always read to each other always say so...mp like Beauty n The Beast while i like The Ugly Duckling ...the former got the word "beast" n the latter got "ugly"... well, so overall this odd job boy not a very gd choice but if u like then ok by all means go ahead...cos yr taste oso not very good though it's improving...then let's move on the candidate #2....kev...

Well actually dun really noe him well la but based on first impression by us he's oso not bad la...At least he not tat "colour" as compared to kel we tink... Summore he dun discriminate us noe...he very friendly n chatty n sociable...but hor not very on lor...he polietly rejected us....wait no! not reject us but our offer..."buy 2 get 1 free" ...No la not tat type of offer...but he refuse to give jie the roses lor...n fought with kel over that pink pink flower with a pink ribbon...so we suspect he may b gay lor like kel...

Btw i noe why kel is gay liao...all mp's fault...after they officially stead for one day...kel cried n handled me his resignation...he say although he love his job alot...he can't force himself to luv mp...n that he had decided to become a GAY...He had given up hopes on all girls in the world...but who noes abt little little gurls n old old aunties leh...he might be aunty killer for all u noe... Btw he cried like siao lor n i had to mop the floor for him...Me leh...i BOSS summore have to do his dirty job haiz....lucky i gurl ah....dun need to do tat scary mental torturous job of dating her...

Ok let's conclude...super long entry liao...Happy Birthday Huiyan!!!! WE DUNNO WHO U WILL ULTIMATELY CHOOSE IN THE END...But think the ans is very obvious rite? U should have the answer i mind bah....All the best n Hope u choose wisely....

Btw ting scolded me today...she scolded "Hey u ugly thing...i dun like u...go away" so here's sth i would like to say to her " the feeling's mutual....i oso dun like yr face...Hope ur hair turn out like shit" (no la juz kidding)

2006-01-14T01:05:00.000+08:00

My 3rd entry to tis blog! Haha weird rite, so long le then only 3rd entry.,,shall write a super long entry...Actually tis is all MP fault lor...she hog onto the blog n almost change password to prevent mi from blogging abt her ex-LeMoN.

Haiz,even now when lemon is outdated,she still refuse to let mi blog noe...so i have no choice but to spike her lemon juice. Haha, tink she quite grateful to mi leh cos she say her whole life nv kena ppl spike drinks cos nobody in the rite mind will...So after spiking her drink, she fell straight to sleep snoring like a pig (u should have seen it 4 yrself),giving me tis very precious chance to finally blog

Yst i learnt a valuble lesson during PE period : NEVER LEAVE YOUR BELONGINGS WITH CURD MUCH SAY ASSIGN HER TO PUT YOUR BELONGINGS IN THE LOCKER COS IT'S FAR TOO SAFE!!! SO SO SO SAFE THAT EVEN THE OWNERS CANNOT HAVE ACCESS TO IT , NOT TO MENTION ANY THIEF.

ok i shall elaborate on tat now... Curd = my jie asked for my belongings and we both headed towards the lockers. At tat time the angmoh pai was there too putting the belongings of the whole class. Feeling inferior n wanting to be unique & different AS USUAL, CURD wAnted to have a space of our own. SHE went to put the belongings in lucky locker No. 11.

MY BIGGEST MISTAKE WAS TO TRUST HER JUDGEMENT!!!

Even though i noe her taste 4 guys was exceptionally incredibly weird after so many yrs of frenship with her, i did not really learn my lessons well n trusted her. So then i was stupidly watching her complete the whole locker procedure in 5 steps...

open the door of the locker
put your belongings in
turn the knob from open to close
set your 4 digits code
scramble the digits so that others cannot secretly unlock the locker

AHHhhhh!!! should have stop her in time to prevent tat mistake...hey wait a min actually i oso couldn't stop her cos me too tot it was the rite procedure.Can u spot the mistake curd has made? Ans: She made a bad judgement n got the sequence wrong!

Should be step 4 1st then step 3 la...Stupid rite? fancy not knowing how to operate the locker after 1 yr. At tat time MP n Fell down was there too but surprisingly they both watch in delight as curd committed that stupid mistake n summore luff at her noe.

So poor thing rite, our curd? Ya rite, i dun tink so lor, ever since i re-met her my luck has nv been gd, i always get into unexpected situations with her...btw she bang her head against the bus door while alighting today.Haiz...nv seen some1 tat dumb de lor haha... SO in the end our belongings became too safely locked up N so embarrassing noe, when i had to go get the teacher to help us. WHY?

Imagine seeing some1 so ugly like mi approaching her already sad enuff liao summore no brains kena have own belongings locked up in the locker, how will she feel? At tat time got 1 guy was oso standing beside the teacher, i tot he was trying to be kaypo or wanted to luff at us...

haha but think it's really fate, it turns out that he was kuz like us ;) lock his stuff in the locker too. Funny thing is tat he had choosen the locker beside our locker no. 11. Too much of a coincidence lor, tats y mp insisted on getting to noe him thinking that he might b her fated dream guy, but sadly tink he got scared away by our looks...

After his departure n mp feeling heartbroken, our locker too was open using a special key. For those who r thinking of using this mtd to steal, drop the idea cos teacher not tat stupid...she will ask for your ez link n c if your face n the foto match not.

But somehow when she told mi n curd our ugly faces match our ez link (Pri6 foto) we weren't really tat happy cos curd n i insist that we have become prettier as compared to the past... But of cos from reliable sources like mp's speech, mi n curd noes that we have to face the cruel reality, we din become prettier...

So in conclusion, dun trust curd's judgement cos it always fails and dun put your belongings in the locker esp with curd cos it might be jux locked up too safely in the locker.

2006-01-07T14:08:00.000+08:00

Today i shall announce the winner of our cold jokes contest! Excitcing right? u wanna know the winner? First i shall summarise the names of the contestant .
1) Kaili also "chou chou" also "da chou"
2) "Kelvin"
3) "bao lian jie"
4) "skittles" also "ye yi ye"
5) me

The winner is ....... 1) "chou chou"
Want to know the reason y? Ur must be thinking i am biased right?
This time ur r right!!! congrats leh...
Ur really think i can give ur free supply of lemon arh? If i give Kelvin, based on his petty character, he confirm pester me for his 1 year free supply of lemon de. So i choose to give to our blog owner Kaili. Think she also sick with Lemon so she won dare to eat lemon(Anyway we already give her lemon during her birthday.)

But anyway we have a special award also. This award goes to "skittles"
The award name is "most really not funny de cold cold jokes" Since she tried so hard n give so many cold jokes, we should recongise her hard efforts. But really, don try too hard!!! Her price is kiss and hug from "chou chou". U can claim ur prize next week.

The rest of the contestant, pls don be sad. Cheer up. TRY HARDER next time. We will have more special prize.

2006-01-03T18:59:00.000+08:00

Rewind a bit to few days ago. Quite busy this few days so didn't update the blog. On New year eve, me, kaili, "ye yi ye" went to explanade to countdown. Alot of ppl there. Squeeze here squeeze there. Me and kaili also take up alot of space as usual. But all this is worth it. The fireworks is romantic but imagine when u turn ur head n u c kaili face. Kana shocked a bit. THe first thing i speak to kaili in 2006 is "kaili, u become prettier liao". Ya, this year shall suan u lesser. Let u take a break n u can have a Kit Kat if u not scared of ur figure. As usual, "ye yi ye" keep telling cold jokes, hey really not funny leh. Our new year wish is if not , u buy jackets for us then we don't mind lor. we decided to go airport to finish our holiday assignment. but the problem is how to go from explanade to airport? we check n found out that bus 36 can go to airport so we waited n waited. finally, bus 36A came n we decided to go up the bus. But unfortunately, bus 36A didn't stop at airport. And so we waited n waited, 1 hour pass but still no sign of bus 36. At this time, 4 Caucasian in ricksaw came n they wish us " happy new year. 2006 is a good year for u , u n u!" Are they the santa that we saw in the wallet shop the other day. but hor, christmas already over liao , y u still here? and then u 1 person become 4 person? but thanks anyway. hope ur wishes will come true! btw we still at the bus stop waiting for bus 36. After another 1 hour of long wait, we decided to give up. we decided to take the night bus NR1 to Yishun MRT becoz that is the only bus available. If u r smart, u will know that actually, yishun n changi r far away. we got down at toa payoh n take a mrt to changi. Finally,we are closer to airport. But really very tired, we do our homework until abt 5.30 then really cannot tolerate liao. so we went jollibean n have soyabean. later we went viewing mall( i think u better don ask us y we go viewing mall , really a bit embarassing. n this is kaili idea hor!)`n now come the exciting part. Got 4 policeman coming our way n they going to check ic. as a good citizen, we prepare our ez link card. but they really very slow n "ye yi ye" wanna go toilet. But if she go toilet, the policeman confirm suspicious. so wat to do? not choice but to hold on until the policeman check finish. Maybe becoz of that kaili la. look so suspicious. not all the ppl there kana check ic. only some of us got check leh. so confirm is becoz of our beautiful kaili.

In conclusion, when u see policeman n u have a fren like kaili (who look suspicious) beside u, leave her as far as possible lor. If not u will get into trouble together.

2005-12-29T00:46:00.000+08:00

Few days ago, me, "Chou Chou" and "skittles" went TM to do our holiday assignments. Half way through, we also don know wat happen, "skittles" started to say she wanna leave. As 2 ignorance ppl, we help her to pack up. Then she pick up her black black bag and leave the comfortable sofa seat. "chou chou" then msg her and asked if she got a date with his guy. She threaten to jump down from a high building!!! Strange strange de leh she. Got mood swing. After abt 32 mins, she came back. Her eyes red red de(got sand enter is it?), then she look quite stupid. Until today, i still don't know wat happen leh. Is it becoz i 2 stupid or "skittles" is 2 complicated to understand?

Btw she say she wanna remain single!!! (haiz... don know wat that guy do to her to let her make such decision) She wanna join our club! We planning to buy a condo when we are abt 30 years old. Y condo? We have already suffered for half of our life so we also wanna enjoy our next half of our life. Furthermore, we also won have stead along the way so we won be wasting much money. ( from survey, having a stead needs a lot of money) Then now she say she also wanna live with us.Funny ger. Still have vacancy leh!!! Any1 wanna join. Limited place.

2005-12-25T12:42:00.000+08:00

Btw we went back to the wallet shop (that we have mention earlier in our past entry) yesterday to find our lovely santa!!! He is still there but strangely, he never come n entertain us. Is it becoz we disclose his identity so he angry with us??? Anyway, kaili found out a big secret, besides a dazzling smile, he also have a nice nice dimple. But he juz refuse to entertain us even we go that shop twice that day.
Hey Santa, pls don be angry with us. Kaili already prapare an ugly and smelly socks liao. Must give her a present leh. Or else she will be very sad. She already so ugly liao, if she still look sad, confirm more ugly de. She waiting for u right now, pls go n find her!!! Merry X'mas!!!

2005-12-24T22:57:00.000+08:00

that "skittles" keep asking me to update my blog so i shall post all my entry today.
So wat shall i tok now? Of coz tell abt "skittles" love story lah!
1 week ago, our ugly spy went Parkway with her family(btw not boyfren leh) n saw our "skittles" with a guy. i shall not tell u this guy name as he is quite fierce. If he beat our ugly spy, then i cannot imagine the outcome. Actually quite normal to see them together, But don know y, "skittles" is very paiseh to see our ugly spy.
So our ugly n big mouth spy went up n ask "skittles": hey, ur together arh?
"skittles" look very shy n walked away
then the guy like quite worried and quickly deny: no hor, she alone eat dinner very pathetic so i accompany her lor. don anyhow say hor!
So our ugly spy is very suspicious n quickly msg me
Then i quickly msg "skittles" to congrats her!
Surprisingly, she didn't deny n accept my blessing.
1 week later, i saw the guy in msn. so as a busybody, i ask him
MP: "skittles" love u leh, u luv her anot??
guy: of coz i luv her lah
this finally clear our doubt. They really together!
Since both of them already confess, then we shall give them our blessing.
Hope ur can enjoy this christmas together!
Btw give ur some clue, this guy same sec sch as "skittles"

2005-12-24T22:48:00.000+08:00

Ur must be wondering y we change our blogskin right?
Cause LEMON IS OUTDATED NOW! That monster on the right hand side of course represent our species. REally must THanks to 'fell down'. She not only help us set up the blog, she also help us change and find the blogskin, tag board......Almost all our blog thing is done by her. If not, I think me n kaili confirm cannot set up this blog to entertain ppl 1. So thanks 'fell down'!!!!

2005-12-24T22:26:00.000+08:00

Few days ago, i went to the haunted hse in Genting. (ur must be wondering, see mirror or c Kaili can liao right, y waste money. no choice mah, bored of seeing myself and kaili liao, wanna try new stuff). Actually, the ghost not so bad 1, juz that sometime got ppl pull my leg, a bit shock cause still got ppl dare to touch me. But that is not the exciting part. Here comes the exciting part, when already the end, and the exit is just in front of me, a guy in red suddenly came up in front of me, raise up his hand like wanna hug me like that. So i do wat a normal person will do. I shouted" DON'T TOUCH ME". ur must be thinking i am crazy right? got ppl dare touch me meh? But that place quite dark mah, the person may not see clearly of me. so i quickly run away. then the person strange strange de, sit at the floor and try to hold my leg. stupid right?Then my sis go and kick the ghost back. Think that ghost quite unlucky leh, sure got blue black de, cause my sis leg quite strong. Sad for him.

Btw still got 1 other visitor who is a tall, foreign and mature guy in front of me. Quite funny leh, don know is it because he see me, cause at the exit there he suddenly cry leh. Really can't imagine a guy like him will cry, moreover is near the end liao. Maybe really is becoz he c me, then he cry. I really so scary meh???

Hey Kaili, must help me revenge leh. Must go the haunted hse and scare back the ghost inside. they confirm scared by u 1. u don even need to make up, like that go in can liao.

2005-12-16T16:03:00.000+08:00

long long time ago which is 4 hours ago, we went Bugis! We went to wallet shop to see wallet. Btw wallet is not a person, is really a wallet! We were deciding between 2 wallet ( 1 is bigger size with more pocket and the other is smaller size n more compact). Then outcame the very helpful but not very handsome shop attendant with a christmas hat.
Shop attendant: Hi, do u need my help?
(in our mind) we were very happy as hardly got ppl willing to serve us with such dazzling smile. think he can join the oral b 笑一笑 competition. but of coz that is not the main point. and anyway the programme already ended.
MP: i don know which to choose
Shop attendant tok abt the pros n cons of the 2 wallet, we shall skip that as it is boring.
hey get ready, here is the climax of the whole story!
Shop attendant: 看人吧, 我觉得你比较适合那个比较大的, 因为跟你人比较接进. haha(looking at us) jux kidding la
US: HUH?
Shop attendant: oh, my joke not funny ah?ho ho ho... (looking jux like santa, he then flash us his dazzling smile once more ,wave at us, said bye and then hop away happily.we can summore hear the jingling bell. b4 we can stop him n ask him summore, he vanish into thin air.
so freaky, but now we know tat santa exist but he oso despise our species.haiz sad leh. Wanna see santa in real person? Feel free to leave yr contact no. at our tagboard. Dun worry, yr particulars will be kept confidential. Ho Ho Ho merry x'mas

2005-12-12T23:47:00.000+08:00

I found an article which support our hypothesis!!!

Good looking ppl have great advantages over the ugly. Foe eg, they earn more:when Barry Harper of London Guildhall University looked at 11,000 British 33 year olds, he found that the pay penalty for unattractiveness was around 15% for men and 11% for women. Overweight women earned 5% less than average, especially in clerical and secretarial jobs. Good looks in both sexes mattered especially, he found, in sales jobs, where the seller meets the buyer. Another study, of 289 Dutch advertising firms, found an association between good-looking executives, higher revenues and business success. Not only do looks help in job market, they help in the marriage market too. Studies show that handsome folks are more confident. It is a cruel fact that good looks can make u a better parent: babies are attracted to prettier ppl. Good looks remove some of life's irritations: another study found that good looking women with a flat tyre get rescued first. A nice face helps to get ppl out of trouble: a recent University of Oslo study found that university students awarded criminals sentences which were 20% lighter if they were told that the villians were "handsome" or "pretty".

Adapted from "The right to be beautiful" in The Economist 22 May 2003

Not only we like that say our species. Even got article like that say us. Everything we do also lose out to pretty ppl.

Even Kaili also choose to donate to handsome guys. Btw she like hardly donate 1. If she donate, that person must be a handsome guy.

Reality is cruel. Miracle will also not happen on us. Fairy tales also does not exist on our species.

I got nothing more to say.....

Y must all the embarassed things happen to our species??? The story starts when i saw my bus, that time quite late liao mah so i wanted to chase that

2005-12-09T11:43:00.000+08:00

Y must all the embarassed things happen to our species??? The story starts when i saw my bus, that time quite late liao mah so i wanted to chase that bus lor(ur must be wondering so fat so ugly still dare to run in the public right? no choice leh, don wanna waste my time n youth waiting 4 the next bus) So i board the bus, n obviously i am the last passenger right. The bus started without letting me tap my card 1st. Moreover, i cannot find my small little card. So i had no choice but to take out my whole pile of notes from my bag. After i tap my card, i decided to take a seat behind. when i started walking behind, the bus make a sudden turn. i kind of fall behind so i quickly choose a nearby seat(clever right?) before i really settle, the bus stop suddenly, i kind of fall sideway n the notes in my hand seem to fall out of my hand. furthermore i am sitting quite in front, so many passengers behind must have watch a free clown performing lor.
In conclusion, if u have no money to go circus, u can take the same bus as me lor!

2005-12-06T00:01:00.000+08:00

My supervisors made a lecture today... oh not abt econs or math or GP of coz but abt sales... hey wait a sec... isn't sales something to do with econs? math? Hmm so got a bit of link la... aniwae that's not my main point.. she said : For promoter, if u r handsome or pretty, u will definitely have sales... ugly promoter of coz no hope la...she then added "for telemarketeers, u don need to have looks to have sales(she look at me with reassuring eyes, at the same time patting my shoulder lightly)... Hey.. think u r more suitable for telemarketeer, ger" then i said" i think i finally got wat u r hinting" the rest nod their head simultaneously... In conclusion, i came to realise that" i don have looks but worst still no nice nice sweet sweet voice... even if i am in telemarketing... still no use---> no sales also...haiz but at least i am smart enuff to figure to figure out what my supervisor meant! Hee Hee quite smart right me? Anyway i don blame her. She is right. If u pity me, pls email me to place ur order on cable tv or maxonline!

2005-12-05T09:29:00.000+08:00

Big News ! Big News !
Got people 'da1 shan4' KaiLi !
There is this Indian Guy who have been sitting beside KL in MRT for very long. (maybe that guy purposely 1?) They got down at the same station. Concidentally, they walked in the same direction. Finally, this guy plucked up his courage and approach KL.
Guy: come Singapore to study arh?
KL: ya (replied excitedly as 1st time got ppl approach her)
Guy: u r from China?
KL: no
Guy: Korea?
KL: no
(guy thinking of more country)
KL: I am Singaporean
Guy: Haiz... disappointed with u (keep shaking his head) y u like to lie? Haiz...
then he walked away shaking his head and keep mumbling to himself haiz with a disappointed face.

If that guy is looking at this blog, I would gladly give u KL no. Juz tag ur email address. Actually, guys who wants KL no. can also tag ur email address.

2005-11-27T11:06:00.000+08:00

"skittles" got a new joke!!!
MP: let's act like a les (less)
"skittles": No, let's be a more
Damn lame lah, "skittles", try harder next time!

2005-11-22T11:40:00.000+08:00

Went airport yesterday. Got discriminated again! A lift scene
the story starts like tat

Before we went in
uncle: beep beep --> warning sound when lift overload (as if asking us not to enter the lift)
But we force our way thru , squeezing every1
After KL enter the lift,
uncle: ah, y the lift haven beep?
(surprisingly the lift never beep hor!)

Haizz... Take lift also got ppl discriminate us! Can't fat ppl take lift?

Lemon got BASH... oh NO!!!

2005-11-18T23:48:00.000+08:00

What happened to lemon??? Mayb he kana bash at the Meridian bash causing him to have bruises all over...Have u eva seen a lemon with bruises??? His bruises not blue black like humans noe? His skin turns from bright yellow to an Orange instead...ya weird hor...summore bright orange leh...so bright that u can even c lemon (or should i say orange 4 the time being) from afar...too ez to spot liao lor he...haha...

Feeling sad 4 lemon that he got bashed? It's ok... tell u sth abt lemon... he's quite brave leh...Din even shed a lemon tear when he got bashed...kept parading in front of ppl summore...not afraid ppl will luff at him for turning orange...if not for that handsome face of his( din kana bah on da face)...wouldn't even realised that tat big big bright orange is actually once a yellow n lemony lemon... Now let's pray with us k...Hope lemon recovers from his injuries real soon n once again revert to his old self- a charming n dazzling yellow lemon...the good old lemon that we all adore:) Yeah!!! Get well SOoN!!!

BTW if u dun get what the above is saying...i shall simplify abit in 6 words...lemon wore orange at the bash...now re-read the whole chunk above...get it???

My "lost necklace"

2005-11-18T13:20:00.000+08:00

Today i very very extremely ultimately sad...u noe wat ultimate means??? That's my size...haha not funny rite...It wasn't suppose to b...It's true...Jux tok to MP on the phone...she did nth except kept rubbing salt into my wound n sang to mi those sad songs...wah realli felt even sadder...not bcos of the song but 4 her...looks like she's gonna need lots of practice b4 she can join the xiao4 yuan2 superstar...But i oso sad bcos i lost my necklace 4 gd n there she is adding fuel to fire... summore add on my misery with her songs haiz...

BTW Lost necklace=shi(1)lian(4)=fallen out of luv...ya get it? Now u understand y i was feel sad??? an advice for ppl who encouter tis scenario where their frens lost necklace...DUN eva sing songs to him/her k...esp if u can sing as well as mp. dun believe u try lor...So after discussing tis issue...we came up with a list of What should those that have fallen out of luv do:

Jump down (not 4 my case ->dun wanna harm innocent ppl ...i fat n ugly enuff liao still jump...even worse...onli cause noise pollution,dirty the place n give ppl nightmare)
Eat alot to relieve stress/forget abt it (not 4 mi cse again...so fat liao eat summore...will anybody wans me? although i noe currently oso nobody wans la)
Cry (i oso cannot...so ugly still cry even worse...ppl still dare to see not)
confront him, ask the person y nv choose u (not advisable 4 mi oso...like he will care like dat...perhaps din even noe i existed in the first place)
Find a new target n move on ( U all should noe y tis is not applicable to mi oso...can i find one?

In conclusion...mi n mp species (ugly ppl) cannot fall out of luv...seriously cannot .Firstly, It's not quite possible for us to find stead much say break-up.Secondly if we r lucky enuff to have stead n have a break-up, there's still nutting we can do abt it rite? Haha jux look at the above...tis species of ours cannot even go n die.So basically we r quite useless lo,even if we tell ppl we shi lian nobody gonna believe.Some will even luff abt it treating it as a joke...but for us tat's ok i guess.At least our existance did have it's purpose...At least we manage to entertain some ppl rite? I certainly hope so...

2005-11-15T14:16:00.000+08:00

Today, I will tok abt KL's Background.
17 years ago, there was a woman in labour and a man waiting for their children to arrive to this world. It was dark that night, very very dark. The awaiting moment came, the crying sound of the baby was heard. When the baby's sister(KaiMei) and brother(KaiJun) saw the baby, they cried and cried, all day all night, they do nothing but cry. At night, when they sleep, they woke up becoz they have nightmare(they saw the baby in their dream). Their mother had no choice but to send them to England(ur must be wondering y not give KL to other ppl, like that easier mah. Use ur brain, KL FOC, ppl also don want lah). So now KL is recongnised as the only child in the family.

All this is juz a MYTH! It's up to u to believe or not. (her mother never tell her b4, some information is me n KL speculate 1)

However, over the years, KL's parent has been going England without bringing KL there. Recently, KL saw her mother with 1 handsome guy n 1 pretty ger in Singapore. Hu r they? Up to u to guess!

ur must be wondering wat KL look like right? She look something like that (that time all the camera man run away after seeing the baby and then all the camera spoil after taking KL. That's y we do not have the baby photo now!)

2005-11-15T00:41:00.000+08:00

Wow still got another new contestant but a bit older. However, age is not a problem!
1) KL: "Kevin" is the most handsome guy in school( after considering 4 a while : actually only lose to lemon la)
"baolian jie": unless there is suddenly a plague then kill all the guys in sch then " Kelvin" will be the most handsome guy

2005-11-15T00:31:00.000+08:00

Another contestant has decided to enter our contest(look like 1 year free supply of lemon is attractive). He is our "Kelvin".
1) MP: air stewardess needs to be qian tu hou qiao
KL: then "skittles" how?
"Kelvin": "skittles" have L-shaped
rest:?????? (how can body be L-shape?)
" Kelvin": (hand gesture) like that l mah... samll letter instead of cap lock.
rest(grabbing 4 jacket): Singapore is snowing meh?

2) MP: U noe how to play keyboard?
" Kelvin" : Of course!!
MP: but u so poor, won't have keyboard at home right?
"Kelvin": Of course have lah, or else how to play computer?

3) KL: wat u wearing 4 Bash? y not wear pajamas ? u wear pajamas also very handsome
"Kelvin": I wear western suit to sleep 1

2005-11-15T00:27:00.000+08:00

I think "skittles" is bent on getting that one year free supply of lemon so she come out with alot of jokes today( although i don think is funny)
3) MP: u don chi cu(jealous in english)
"skittles": I don chi su ( vegetarian in english)

2005-11-14T23:55:00.000+08:00

Since we discussed the advantages yesterday, we must have a balanced view as wat "bao lian jie" has taught us. So now, I will be elaborating on the disadvatages of ugly.

Disadvantages of ugly

eat kui (lose out)

Scenario 1: imagine a guy eating our toufu, we complain, then the guy li3 zhi2 qi4 zhuang4 say " got mirror not? go see see" ppl will believe that guy rather than us. ( maybe we still have to apologise to that guy)

Scenario 2: imagine we are buying food, we ask for more liao, then the seller will say" eat eat eat, so fat so ugly still wanna eat somemore, waste our resources"

2. being laughed at(ppl give us nickname like clown, pig and ppl always tell us bu yao er)

Scenario 3: imagine a group of beatiful gers posing 4 a photo ---> Guys response: very cute, very sweet, wonderful... Then imagine us with the same pose, same place, same camera, same group of guys, ceteris paribus ----> Guys response: disgusting, grabbing 4 plastic bag to puke or some will say: wao lao, don act cute hor!

In conclusion, being ugly has its advantages n disadvantages. Pesonally, we feel that the advantages outweighs the disadvantages. that's y we remain still ugly.

But we r doing charity in this life, as we hope to discuss the advantages n disadvantages of being beautiful in our next life.( as we noe that we must have committed murder put fire in our previous life that's y we r like that now---> quoted by "Kelvin")

2005-11-13T15:13:00.000+08:00

Today we shall tok about the Advantages of Being Ugly.
Being ugly does have benefits ( we have 17 yrs of experience)

Safe to go home at night. ( u should noe y)
Don't need to dress up (dress up also ugly, so y bother?)

save money
save time
won't be late 4 appointment (like ppl want to date us like that)

3. Beautiful gers like to hang out with us as we can make them stand out (no wonder we got so many beautiful frens)

SOME handsome guys don't mind to hang out with us as they want the no. of our beautiful frens

4. don't need to think of ways to reject ppl ( we can only accept, cannot reject. Look @ us ! can we reject? Anyway we also don't have chance to reject)

5. got a lot of free time( cause we don need to accompany our stead as we won't have stead mah)

time can be used to study
or stay @ home to accompany our parents (filial right? cause we also nowhere to go wat)

The advantages are 2 much. u can make urself ugly then u can enjoy the benefit urself!

2005-11-13T15:02:00.000+08:00

Scene 1, Take 1, Action!
2 average-looking couple holding hands at Orchard
A(not her real name): "Eww...yucks! So ugly still follow ppl to have stead, don't they know that this will cause harm to their next generation?(by passing down their ugly genes to the next generation) I think the govt should pass down laws to ban ugly ppl from marrying each other."
The above is said by A whom we admit that she is above average looking. But being better looking than us, doesn't entitle her the right to critisize our own species.
Do U agree With HER?
U don agree right?
Silence means consent. Ok, treat u to lemon! Come n find us to redeem ur free Lemon.

2005-11-12T23:46:00.000+08:00

Another Contestant "lingmeng angel" (MP)'s joke
I am a joke myself!

2005-11-12T23:36:00.000+08:00

After we post "skittles" jokes, there is a overwhelming response. Therefore, we decided to hold a contest for the coldest joke.
so here goes "lemon tian shi"(KL) joke
1) Mp: That's our life(ren sheng in chinese). Then she say: Ginseng 2 expensive, we cannot afford it, furthermore we eat also no use to us.
2) "cowie": Idiot(bai chi in chinese). Then she say: we cannot eat the food without paying as our size 2 big, run away also will kana caught as we r easily seen.

Information of the contest
Due Date: End of December 2005
Prize: 1 year free supply of LEMON!
Contestant juz need to write their jokes on the tagboard or tell us personally!

2005-11-12T21:04:00.000+08:00

why is there a shop mango but no lemon? Ppl choosing shop name, pls consider LEMON!!!
Haha... actually, lemon is a nickname we give to the person. U must be thinking so he is handsome and nice guy right? NO! He is a joke in our class.. Entertain ourself by toking abt him. LeMoN iS tHe In ThInG nOw! when we change our target, we shall close this Block. Don think we really like him hor! ( However, we suspect "yam" like him as she keep definding him and say he is cute) Shall post his pic next few days! So keep checking this Block!
To S321 ppl : don tell ppl hu is Lemon!

2005-11-12T20:47:00.000+08:00

let's start with "skittles" jokes
First Episode:
1) we saw shoes that make of pigskin then she said " hey, this shoes is make of "cowie" skin"
2) she know of a fren that call Mei Lian then she tell me "that ger call Meridian" then she laugh at her own jokes.

Wahaha... Her jokes are damn cold. But as her fren we have to laugh la. So ppl when u c her, juz laugh hor.
Btw u can vote which joke is colder so we can ask her to think of that kind of jokes.
Shall continue the Second Episode when we meet her

* name in" " are nickname that we give them. think of the person urself or u can ask us!

2005-11-11T18:49:00.000+08:00

the story begins with 2 idiots waiting in the canteen waiting for Miss Poh for 1 hour... We kana scolded for not calling her. forced to stand in one corner as we r 2 noisy... luckily we clever take 2 chairs instead of standing there like clown. After discussing our i n r, we went to suntec to have lunch. i know wat u will think ... so fat still eat right? but we r normal ppl, we still need to eat u noe? So we ate at kenny there lor. $9.35 each including GST for a set meal. As both of us got deprived childhood, we went toys R us to relieve childhood. we took pictures with kitty n rose(although a bit disgusting) After that, we bot this cool bottle(Pink n Orange de cause no yellow) whick can keep our liquid cool not as in the look is cool but is cold. If u interested, come n find us n c the bottle urself... fast 4ward fast 4ward--> poof! now at Fel hse doing our block... got to go watch prince turn frog now. bye!

2005-11-11T18:42:00.000+08:00

I am sure all of u are wondering y we create tis block????
Hmm... shall i tell u? Or shall I not? U tell mi the secret password la...Did i hear u say LeMoN??? Yeah!!! u r rite....oh here goes the reason....
mp likes lor then create la...duh...ask stupid qn onli